The Emotionally Destructive Marriage (how to find your voice and reclaim your hope).

Leslie Vernick, Waterbrook Press, 2013.

“Women in an emotionally abusive marriage desperately need this book so that they can diagnose just how bad their marriage is and then, with Leslie’s clear expertise, develop a plan that will either begin to turn their marriage around… or give them a wise route of escape.”

Who this book is for:

This book is not for people experience general marriage difficulties, but where there is genuine emotional and/or physical abuse within the marriage relationship.  Note also that emotional abuse can extend from controlling behaviour through to neglect and indifference.

Big Idea – Something has to change:

Vernick recognizes that all too often Christian women get caught in emotionally and physically damaging marriages in an attempt to submit and to be the perfect Christian wife.  In such cycles of abuse it is the wife that needs to act for the sake of both parties.  The book does not advocate a single solution approach but rather prompts the counselee to assess just how bad their own situation is, how likely the situation is likely to change and ultimately to decide whether she would remain and work on the marriage or leave where change is deemed impossible.

Even once that decision has been made, Vernick advocates that the wife should leave well, or remain well, with every activity backed up by solid biblical advice.


This is an incredibly practical book, that offers step by step advice for any woman experiencing abuse within the marriage relationship.  The book is thoroughly Christian and offers sound biblical advice.